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I am a new member and hope this is the correct group to ask for advice. I am 64 years old, but my phyiscal appearance and energy levelis that of a much younger person. I am very fit because I have made proper exercise and food a lifestyle from an early age. After retiring as a CPA, I became a certified personal trainer. I have my own training business, but l also train clients for a national fitness club. Many members of the club know I am a trainer and from time to time ask me for advice. I enjoy a reputation as having one of the hardest training workouts for myself and the best trainer on staff. That information is a backdrop to the advice I need. Some woman will come up to me and ask me to either give them advice or help them with an exercise. I am terrible at reading ques and do not know if they are interested in me personally or just my adivice. Some of my fellow trainers tell me "she is interested in you", but I am reluctant to make an advance for fear that I misread the situation. Even if the person was interested, I am not sure what to say or what my next move would be(lets go have a smoothie together,etc). I have been divorced for many years, but have dated occasionally. I tried to make this information and question simple, but may not have succeeded. Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated!

An interesting series of questions arose in another post here:

Do you still live near your "Home place" ?
How far away are you now?
How "connected" are you to your past?
How have you stayed connected? (If you wanted too)

Personally, I live about 250 miles from where I call "home" and still visit there regularly to see family but very rarely see any old classmates from high school although perhaps 35% now live in the area (it is a coastal region nationally recognized as a retirement mecca)-- I do follow my classmates through the high school website -- (Possibly the fact that I was very introverted and anti-social in high school means that I never really had any real friends from that era)-- Well, next year is the BIG class reunion and we will see how it plays out then.

as I had mention in an earlier post I have the toy run coming up. One thing that I do each year for it is have about 100 lbs of deer sausage cooked for everyone to munch on, so this morning I took to the woods. It was dark when I left and made my way along the path taking me to my deer stand I had sit up the evening before. A light breeze was blowing and it carried the dampness of the woods from the previous days rain with it. It was great for walking because the ground was soft and the leaves wet which helped muffle my clumsy self stumbling in the dark. The combined dark of night and shroud of the big pines made the trek slower than usual because not even the star light could shine through. After reaching my stand I did a last minute safety check of it, my rifle and thermos (the important thing) I climbed the tree set my safety harness and settled in for the morning light. I could see it off in the distance coming from the east rolling toward me like a run away train. I had position myself over looking a opening in the woods with a field about 2 to 3 acres. I had seen some rubs and tracks the previous scout trips into the woods and thought that my location would be perfect. It was not cold enough for a frost to form so I didn't get to the magic of a frost forming as the sunlight chased away the darkness. I sipped on my coffee and tried to stayed focused ( for those of you who have met me you know I was struggling..LOL) It wasn't long before I was watching the chickadee in the brush below me scurrying around, the Grey squirrels making their way down the slippery pines and listening to the lonely crow caws off in the distance. Some where in all of this two hours drifted away my mind was kidnapped by the colors of fall which mother nature had whipped together like mix colors of a palette and if any deer came near I never seen then. So It looks like I get to do it all over again this evening....Lucky me.. :-)

On my previous post about the "frustrations of dating" there was some interesting points brought out as well as some "questionable suggestions" as to how come the cold shoulder after the actual date which was led up to by multiple meetings...for the most as I also agree with, move on...it didn't click...was it because I did something wrong or broached the wrong subject or made a inappropriate advance. I can assure you it was non of those...I have always said I was a redneck.........but more than that " I am a southern gentlemen redneck"...with all of the input from my fellow 50+ers...I started analyzing ( did you ever notice that "anal" is the first part of analyzing...kind of puts it into perspective ..lol) ...so here's my questions or vision however one would want to look at it...what is the worst thing that occurred in the beginning stages of a relationship that through up the red flag that it wasn't going to work.
Here's my story
I tried the POF dating site and connected with a woman who's profile seemed very interesting .....we communicated via e-mail and then phone...arranged a neutral spot where we could me that had lots of exits in case either one of us wanted to run madly from the building. We met, it was good. we continued a line of communication and had the second date...then the third ..I picked her up at her house and she invited me in...she had told me she was a widow and had lost her husband to a freak naval accident (military). Well needless to say she had a "small" memorial in side her living room dedicated to him. Now before you jump to conclusions..I was ok with this ...mainly because it was her house and I was a guest there and it was none of my business how she chose to remember her late husband...we went out....for some reason she felt compelled to explain about the memorial....and by the content of the entire conversation I could tell she was not yet at the stage of moving on with her life...I listen and commented when I felt it appropriate....( from the the two years on here I have developed some do's and don't rules while on a date and I am ever guarded not to talk about "ex's)...still yet this was not the proverbial nail in the coffin for me..we continued out communication and arranged another date ..on the night of the date I picked her up we went to a restaurant and had just poured a nice glass of wine. When she started to tell me of a Navy tradition of having a " coin medallion" made with a ships name on it along with the serving dates or tour dates and when there was a crew change the medallions where handed to the crew as they left the ship...She then reached in her purse and pulled out a slightly larger than a half-dollar medallion....she then said..I had this made it has my husband serving times aboard his ship....I flew to London and met the ship when it came in and I handed one to every crew member as they departed...I looked at the coin and commented on how nice it was and slid it back to her..she go's oh no ..its yours I want you have one to carry........Well that was the straw that broke the camels back...I had no idea who this man was and was not going to carry a memorial coin around of a complete stranger..I told her that made me feel awkward and uncomfortable and I felt it was best I took her home....and that was that......I couldn't accept that
So that was my worst one

I AM GOING TO BE 58 YEARS OLD THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING.
LIKE MOST OF US WE ARE THINKING OF THE MISTAKES THAT WE MADE IN THE PAST.

THE OTHER DAY I LISTEN TO A MINISTER ON TV. AND HE TALKED ABOUT 3 MAN EACH ONE WERE CARRYING BAGS, ONE IN THEIR BACK AND ONE IN THE FRONT.

ONE MAN HAD A BAG OF REGRESTS AND SORROW , PAIN, SHAME ETC, ON HIS BACK .IN THE FRONT HE HAD ALL THE POSTIVE THINGS THAT HE HAD AND WANTED TO DO BUT THE BAG ON HIS BACK WOULD WAS TOO HEAVY AND IT WOULD NOT ALLOWED HIM TO MOVE FORWARD TO DO THE THINGS THAT HE HAD IN THE FRONT BAG.

THE SECOND MAN HAD THE BAG WITH THE GOOD THINGS IN HIS BACK BUT THE NEGATIVE BAG IN HIS FRONT, BUT IT COULD NOT MOVE FORWARD SINCE THE ( BAD ) BAG WOULD NOT ALLOWED HIM TO MOVE FORWARD INSPITE OF HAVING THE GOOD BAG ON HIS BACK.

THE THIRD MAN HAD THE "BAD" BAG IN HIS BACK AND THE "POSITIVE " BAG IN HIS FRONT BUT WAS MOVING FORWARD. THE OTHER TWO MAN ASKED HIM OF HOW WAS HE MOVING FORWARD SINCE HE HAD THE "BAD" BAG IN HIS BACK. HE REPLY THAT HE HAD MADE A WHOLE IN THE BACK BAG SO THINGS WERE FALLING LEAVING THE BAG A LOT LIGHTER.

I AM TRYING TO DO THAT. AND I THINK THAT WE ALL SHOULD DO THAT. LIVE A GOOD LIFE. JESUS ALREADY PAYED FOR OUR SINS AND HE FOGIVE US. WHY NOT US? IF WE DO NOT LIVE A POSITIVE LIFE NOW , WHEN?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME :-)

ROSA

I was up early this morning ....the rain has set in and definitely let the temperature get down to a below cool. A great morning for a walk.....I filled up my thermos and put on my parka and strapped on the boots....as always to start my morning walks I head out through the back of my lot... pass Wingnuts grave as if to pick him up and ease into the woods.....the rain is a slow drizzle and it is making all of the ground Fern shimmy and shake making it look like a pond of green water with the wind blowing across. I decided to stay in the woods today and worked my way along the path that was muddy and slippery with the fresh growth of chickweed. After about 15 minutes I came upon a old pine which had fell victim to time ...it limbs had kept it propped up on one end and made it a good resting place. I poured the coffee and listen to the woods. The rain was splattering all over but the canopy of the tall pines had reduced it to just drops. Off in the distance I heard a squirrel chattering ....probably at me for being out in the rain or at least in his woods...I tried to chattered back...something my father had taught me when we was hunting....it more and likely scare him because I never heard him again ....he probably wondered what the hell was that and scampered to his nest. Other than that there was very little noise in the woods today ....I sat there and watched my breath rise up and disappear. After my coffee...I moved on and crossed a little stream that was running rapidly now that it had a fresh supply of rain water...there was fresh wild onion plants growing along with nut grass and the stream had over flowed and had partially submerged them. I pulled one of the wild onion stems and tasted it...yep it was a onion plant. As I made it to the edge of the woods that is when my heart went still and the black ghost appeared....just like old times about 25 yards off to my right a black lab broke out of the bush and was running along side the field line...I could tell he was trailing something cause his head was down ...it didn't even see me and just like that it was back in the woods and gone.....all I could think of was Wingnut my long time companion and the many times we had hunted .....I don't know how long I stood there straining my eyes and ears just to get one more glimpse of the big black lab running but it was not to be.....but the strange thing was I really felt good ....I made my way back home with an occasional look over my shoulder ....you know just in case .....a certain black dog might be following ......I hope its raining tomorrow...I like walking in the rain

This is something that has been on my mind for quite some time ( like 35 years or more ). As anyone knows, who reads my posts, I might seem somewhat immature for a 64 year old. It's not that I want to act older......I like the way I am.......it's just I really always thought that at some point I'd feel and think more like an adult ( whatever that feels like ). When told to act like an adult that is exactly what I do....ACT. I know I am separated from younger people by a different frame of reference...........I grew up with no television, then a small tv that got 3 channels, cars without power anything, 78 rpm records, and into a life and a country that seemed less complicated. I really do feel like the proverbial younger person peering out from a body that is growing older..........at least I have my memories.........somewhere?
Memories.......of a time when I had sex with women who were conscious. When I passed pretty women and caught them looking at me as I gazed back at them. Times when I left my house at 10 p.m. to party......now that's when I get home IF I am out partying. My phone rings less and less as my immediate family is deceased and so are many of my old friends.
As I read the above it sounds somewhat depressing.......yet, I'm having a great time. I love not working, I love traveling, and I like my own company.....my life is more of a self directed adventure then it was at any previous stage. I meet up with new friends from eons all over the country........what is missing is the shared history of my family and the friends I grew up with..........to paraphrase.......this is the best of times and the worst of times.............I'm growing older....but hopefully I'll never grow up.

Go BUCKS